


I've Waited So Long

by ich_bin_ein_stern



Series: I Just Really Love Haikyuu!! [10]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Post-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Sudden confession
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:34:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28159848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ich_bin_ein_stern/pseuds/ich_bin_ein_stern
Summary: “I leave for Argentina next month, Ushiwaka.”“Limited time together aside, will you give me the opportunity?”
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Series: I Just Really Love Haikyuu!! [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1007295
Comments: 16
Kudos: 96





	I've Waited So Long

**Author's Note:**

> I intended to wait until Jan 1st, like I mentioned on Twitter, but the temptation was killing me.

“I’ve been in love with you for 15 years.”

Wine glass only centimeters from his mouth, Oikawa pauses briefly before knocking the rest back. With such a statement spoken out loud without care, Oikawa thinks of all the potential scandals that someone could create from those words. But Ushijima has always been bold in his declarations and this is something he should have expected to pop up eventually. 

“Why?” Because he wants to hear what’s so gobsmacking unique about him that has caused a decade and a half pursuit. 

To his silent surprise, Ushijima doesn’t respond right away. Inside the dimly lit bar, where a scatter of people sit around them in their own small groups, he watches Ushijima watch him - eyes always intense and hands seemingly twitching with _want_.

“I have always admired you,” Ushijima begins, “as many do. Your ability to connect with any team you are a part of - bringing them together with ease - is something I’ve strived for since I met you. You have always been a strong opponent on the court.”

Oikawa hums. It’s nothing new to him. “I see.” He raises his glass with a nod towards one of the women manning the bar and smiles at the one that refills his glass, and then Ushijima’s at his insistence.

“You’re beautiful when you’re on the court,” Ushijima states after taking a sip from his glass, “and when you’re off. Your form is perfect. Setting, and serving. Receiving. I used to wonder what it would have been like if you did attend Shiratorizawa.” 

“‘ _You should have come to Shiratorizawa_ ,’” Oikawa mimics. “I’m glad I didn’t.” He studies Ushijima’s face, waiting for some sort of unordinary reaction. 

But Ushijima surprises him with his response: “I’m glad you didn’t either.”

Oikawa leans back, one eyebrow cocked and expression showing desire for an elaboration. 

“I have spent many years wondering why you wouldn’t want to be a part of my team, a part of Shiratorizawa’s strength, but have come to understand that wanting you, and needing you, are two separate things. For so long I have considered them the same. Ultimately,” he cradles his glass before hands, “I have realized that having you there would have stunted your growth.”

“That’s an interesting perspective, Ushijima.”

Oikawa cannot help but feel pleased with Ushijima, not looking at him, smiles a little at the...nickname(?) he has given him.

“Coach Washijo operated on a different mindset with different desires for each of my teammates. Our primary goal was - is - strength. But with you and Aoba Johsai, it was different somehow. I do not think I can put it in adequate words.” Ushijima looks up at him. “You kept your head high, even when your team lost. You were reassuring and proud of what they accomplished.”

“Because - ”

“Because you know they put their best forward, each and every time they were on the court with you. That they gave their blood, sweat, and tears to move forward. You were a good captain. You _are_ a good captain.” 

Oikawa stares him down. “My team was the best team out of any team in Miyagi. Even when you told me it was a mistake to attend Aoba Johsai and even when we never made it to nationals, I know they were the best. I witnessed them fall down and get back up in every way, shape, and form. They never complained when I told them to keep pushing. I could not have asked for a better team than that. Even now, as I played for a team in a different country, I know it is highly unlikely that I will ever play for a team that has made me as proud and as grateful as they did. Win together, lose together. We did it together and that was the most important part at the end of the day. Our faith in each was unwavering. I have yet to relieve the same feeling I did back then.”

“I regret my words,” Ushijima replies after absorbing everything he said. “I placed my desires over yours. I spent a long time believing that you would have excelled at Shiratorizawa but I was wrong. Shiratorizawa would have kept you in a bubble, so to speak. I would never want that for you.”

“But you are a strong player, Ushiwaka. That strength you have - that skill - is something that came out because of Shiratorizawa.” 

Ushijima tilts his head, nodding in agreement. “However, we are two very different people, Oikawa, so we would have been affected differently.”

“And that, Ushiwaka,” Oikawa declares happily as he picks up his glass, “is how I know you actually understand why I made the choices I did.” He takes a heaping gulp, enjoying the sweet burn as it slides down his throat, before placing it down. “But all of this - admiring me and understanding my decisions - doesn’t explain how you are in love with me. You don’t know me outside of volleyball.” 

Ushijima’s reply is immediate. “I understand this...which is why I would like to get the chance to know you outside of volleyball if you’ll let me.”

“I leave for Argentina next month, Ushiwaka.”

“Limited time together aside, will you give me the opportunity?” 

“And if things don’t work out in your favor?”

Ushijima reaches across the table and takes his hand, his action bold but his grip loosens in case he wants to pull away. “I wish for this to be done mutually. If you do not want to, I would like to at least establish a friendship with you. If you do not want that either, I will respect your choice and no longer bother you.”

“Knowing me on a personal level may drive you away, Ushiwaka.”

“I sincerely doubt that, Oikawa.” 

“Tooru.”

Without hesitating: “Wakatoshi.”

“I’m going to stick to Ushiwaka,” Oikawa states. His tone is challenging. 

“If that is what you wish, Tooru.” Challenge accepted.

Oikawa represses a shiver. “It is.” They sit in silence for a bit, Oikawa with thoughts of their high school interactions and how they could have gone better and he suspects Ushijima is thinking the same. 

"Do you - " Ushijima pauses, goes to speak again, and then pauses once more. 

"Are you trying to ask me if I want to leave?"

Ushijima nods.

"Ushiwaka, I expect you to wine and dine me first before I put out."

In the dim of the bar, he sees Ushijima's face steadily growing red at his bold statement.

"Tooru." Why does he have to say his name like that? "I would like to know you on a personal level, as I mentioned a moment ago, before any potential physical relationship starts."

Oikawa laughs.

This response is exactly what he expected yet also endearing in a very Ushijima way.

"I see." He downs the last of his drink and stands up. When he sees Ushijima still sitting, he cocks an eyebrow. "Are we not leaving?" He asks this while putting on his jacket.

Ushijima quickly follows suit.

Oikawa pays for every drink they ordered without complaint from Ushijima - something which decidedly pleases him. He does thank him, however, for opening the door and allowing him to walk out into the chilly night first. The cold made the heat of his cheeks apparent. 

Perhaps he was flustered by a few comments made between them?

“Do you have any place in mind, Ushiwaka?”

“There are shops nearby that are open late. Perhaps we can window shop?”

Oikawa bites his tongue on a teasing comment. It’s nearing 11PM so he doubts many shops up the street are still open. Still, he follows Ushijima’s lead. As they walk towards the shopping center, a scatter of people with shopping bags and coffee in their hands appear. 

Nearly all of them, Oikawa notices, are couples of varying ages. 

“Do you come here often, Ushiwaka?”

“When I was younger, yes. My parents used to bring me here when I was younger. That shoe store,” he nods towards a luxury shoe shop, “used to be a chocolate shop. My mother would let me pick out two chocolates every time he came, one for on the way home and one for the following day.”

“Do you have a bit of a sweet tooth?”

Ushijima nods. “I like chocolate.” He appears to want to say more so Oikawa gestures for him to continue. “Aside from volleyball, it is one of my fonder memories of my childhood.”

It gives them something to talk about, so Oikawa asks: “Will you tell me about your childhood?”

“I am close to my father. He introduced me to volleyball. Trained me to be the best I can be. Aside from that we used to go on fishing trips or to my grandmother’s strawberry farm before she passed.” Ushijima stops walking. Oikawa notices they are outside a small coffee shop. “Recently, I spoke to him about the choices he made as I grew up and the choices I made once I became an adult and then he asked me a question that I haven’t been able to answer yet.”

“Oh?” Oikawa is intrigued. “And what question would that be?”

“He asked me if I have fun playing volleyball.”

Oikawa pauses. 

A series of memories flash through his mind of a sunny beach in Brazil, of how a former high school rival (now friend _and_ rival) reminded him of the fun he should be having when he’s on the court, and thinks maybe Ushijima is in a state of mind similar to that which he had been in before he met up with half of Karasuno’s former quick-performing duo.

“You don’t know if you have fun playing volleyball?”

Ushijima looks past him, expression shifting to one of uncertainty. “I am good at volleyball. I enjoy being on the court. I like facing newer, stronger opponents.”

Oikawa chooses his words carefully. “I spent a brief time in Brazil where I stumbled across a certain orange-haired, high jumping individual that I honestly did not expect to see there. We played a two-on-two game that, at some points, was frustrating. Let me tell you, Ushiwaka, that playing on sand is not easy. So many variables come into play. Anyway,” he boldly steps closer, “during that game it hit me out of nowhere that I was having fun again.”

“Again?”

He nods. “People like you and me who dedicate their lives to something they’re passionate about sometimes forget what the driving force behind that passion is. Inspiration. Ability. _Fun_. Positive aspects that lead us to striving for the highest form of skill imaginable. I can’t speak for you but I can speak for myself. If I’m not having fun, then there’s no point in playing volleyball. I don’t want to be in this career if I spend my days feeling nothing beyond duty.”

Ushijima gazes at him with open admiration and if this were any other time, Oikawa would tease him.

“What I’m getting at is that you shouldn’t let your passion become a chore, Ushiwaka.”

“I see.” Ushijima then nods. “Thank you, Tooru. I will consider your words.”

_Practical as ever_ , Oikawa thinks. “Good. Be sure to call your father and tell him when you’ve figured out your answer.”

“I will.”

And Oikawa smiles.

**Author's Note:**

> Twitter: @stan_haikyuu 
> 
> Come talk to me about UshiOi~


End file.
